what DOES NOT matter on your wedding day

Here’s the thing - everyone going through or that has gone through the wedding planning process understands that it is human nature to freak out about all sorts of wedding details. I know I am guilty of this. I worried about things a bride should not be worrying about like “who is going to move the welcome sign from the outdoor ceremony inside?”, “who is going to make sure the guests take their name plates?”, “what if the wait staff gives people the wrong dish?”.


Or more common things to worry about include hoping that all your vendors show up when and where you need them, while juggling your bridal party getting ready, while also trying to relax. I have been there and I totally get it. This is why I decided to hire a day of coordinator. I knew I was too type A to relax, so I hired someone else to do the worrying for me - and guess what - it worked! I actually really got to relax the day of my wedding. So if you are on the fence for a day of coordinator I highly suggest it! More about that in another post.

But anyways - the point of this post is “what doesn’t matter on your wedding day”, and I am going to be quite frank with you. Honestly in my experience, nothing else mattered except the fact I was marrying my best friend. Things went wrong, things did not go in the order or way in which I had planned them. Did it matter? No. Did I notice the day of? Not really. Looking back, do I regret worrying as much as I did? 100 X a million PERCENT. Wedding planning is supposed to be the most exciting time of your life!!


It does not matter if it rains, it does not matter if you forget your cake cutting knife, or your earrings you were supposed to wear. I had spent so much time worrying about the perfect bridesmaid proposal gift and monogramming everyone’s champagne glasses for the day of. I spent time worrying about so many little things that in the end did not matter. All I really remember is dancing the night away with my guests and new husband, and having the absolute time of my life. I remember taking in the room full of everyone that we loved, and realizing they were there for us. For days after the wedding I was so high on the wedding bliss, that I completely forgot about all the stress leading up. But looking back I regret stressing so much.

I know what I am saying is way easier said then done. I know hindsight is 20/20. I know during the planning process it is so easy to get caught up and overwhelmed in every little detail - but please remember to take a step back and remember why you are getting married. I cannot emphasize enough…DO NOT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. When you look back on your day, you remember the smile on your husband’s face when you walked down the aisle, you remember the embraces you shared with your family and friends, you remember the feeling you got when you looked at yourself in your dress. So every time you feel overwhelmed, think about the big picture and if it will matter when you look back and think about your day. If the answer is no, let it go. (Again, I know this is so much easier said then done, but take it from the most type A bride you can imagine….the small details do not matter).

Sorry this is a longer post then usual! But I feel that this is a very important wedding topic! I am a firm believer of making your fairtytale wedding a reality. I know weddings do not come cheap these days, and for someone who DIYed 75% of my wedding in 10 months, I can honestly tell you it can be done if you put your mind to it, and take help where you can get it. To all you DIY brides, I wish you the best of luck, and please let me know if you have comments, questions or concerns about your DIY projects. I did so much for my own wedding while working 60+ hour weeks, so I feel your struggle. Congrats all you brides to be, I hope your day is everything you dreamed of.


Until next time,



**All photo credit: Derek Halkett

Kyrsti Tam